Cotton wool for brains

The world is a quiet and lonely place.

I'm sitting here at 4am with nothing more than an inanimate object for company; a flashing cursor willing me to talk to myself. It's my 2nd night of insomnia.

I haven't the concentration for this; I can barely face trying to read other blogs, articles from the News websites or the book I started earlier in the night. Listening to the television makes me feel even lonelier at these times and I've already listened to and hour and a half of music. I'm all philosophical and I know that's dangerous - really, there is no point to the world, get over it! Plus, who cares at what point a 'pile' of feathers becomes large enough to be called a 'heap'??!!!

I'm tired. Thing is, apart from not getting sleep I've also been having panic attacks and taking medication - I've been working hard at the Allotment and making myself talk to people and try to be 'normal' - I'm not just in search of slumber, it's imperative. Without it my depression gets even worse, I have no energy to fight on and my double vision goes haywire.

I know my time on this Earth is limited but right now it feels like it's dragging by and will never end; I'll be exhausted and weepy for eternity. (Silly aren't I? There are people out there with real problems right now.)

What do you do when you can't sleep???? Do not say 'count sheep', I will track you down and give you a slap with a wet lettuce!