Thursday 17 September 2009

Don't adjust your settings..

For a moment I must take a minor detour onto the world of public planting schemes, it's for my dear VP who is rather obsessed with the whole thing. I am cheating a little tiny bit here as these photos aren't from my neighbourhood but are instead from the beautiful city of Caen in Normandy. I took them for VP in the first place and now she is looking for September displays for the OOTS segment.

I was truly impressed by these (and an awful lot of public planting in Brittany and Normandy ~ spectactular roundabouts) in front of the City Hall. Especially with the use of kale in the planting; veggies, why not!?


I am really trying every trick in the book to stall the walk I am supposed to be going on with Maggie the wonder dog. Every time I hear someone outside make a noise or I think about the walk ahead I literally feel like being sick. I'm scared, so panicky I am shaking and all huddled up on the sofa with the blinds still closed. I HATE being out at home alone. I HATE having this intense anxiety too. I HATE me.

6 comments:

  1. Carrie girl .. the first thing I want you to do is not be angry with yourself for feeling like this. You can't control how intensely this takes over your body and mind.
    Maggie is there with you .. you are in a safe place. Just close the world off and try to take some tension out of your muscles .. try to breath as relaxed as possible .. don't let your body tense up so badly, it is a vicious cycle of muscle tension and anxiety. .. do you do any yoga ? .. I know that sounds a little too "light or silly" for how you feel .. but believe me I understand .. and basic yoga has helped me so much at times .. it is hard to explain.
    This time will pass .. hang on to that single thought sweetie .. it WILL pass ..
    Get comfortable , cuddle up with Maggie and do NOT beat yourself up for feeling this way .. I promise it will pass !
    Joy : )

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  2. thank you Joy, you don't know how much that meant to me xxx

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  3. To have feelings, is normal. Not having feelings is absolutely abnormal... We can ride on feelings and have control over them just like what we do with automobile. We get better each time.... Blog on Carrie.. ~ bangchik and kakdah.

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  4. Hi Carrie really the yoga thing is good advice, after I went through a rough patch a few years ago I went to yoga classes and learnt how to breathe. It was a revalation. It helps me to sleep and is very calming.
    The kale in that photo doesn't have caterpillars on it - have you photoshopped them out?

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  5. Thank you Bangchik xx

    I do do yoga, I've been practicing for 15 years, but only very now and then. It is fabulous for breathing deeply. I did see a council gardener a little down the way from this kale patch, maybe he got rid of them, I don't even have photoshop, so it is suspicious...

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  6. Hi Carrie - thanks for thinking of OOTS whilst you were on holiday :) Those French public plantings are the bees knees!

    Seeing everyone's talk about yoga has triggered a thought to share. Do check you're breathing properly whilst at your computer. When I got all stressed out, I realised after a few months that I was actually holding my breath quite a lot of the time when at my computer. I'm sure that didn't help me at all!

    Hope you're feeling better today and there's plenty of sunshine to tempt you out onto the allotment :)

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