I've had a run of good days, 2 in a row! Thanks to my Hubby and my dearest of friends for continuing to celebrate my birthday over the weekend. Only last night did I start to feel bad and it has continued into today. I am waiting for another tablet to start working to help calm me down. You see I have a problem with people being lovely to me; I feel I don't deserve it and should therfore be punished after, by myself to create balance.
This feeling was further compouned by the fabulous Blogger VP (or veep) when she was recently so nice about a post I had written in the past. See her words here.
It's a very strange and stupid reaction to something that does actually makes me feel good and worthwhile. I just have a hard time with praise. I feel a little crazy right now but need to stay occupied until I can drift off a while. I've being playing FarmVille on Facebook to distract me!! Can't get to the lottie and too serevely anixous to step outside the door so; I bring a 'farm' to me, haha.
Hopefully I feel better tomorrow x
I am lucky in a way Carrie, garden is right here whenever I open the door or peep through windows...
ReplyDeleteCheers and have a nice day.
~bangchik
Don't get me wrong Banfchik I have 2 lovely gardens here at my wee house but my anxiety is just so bad I can't even go into them on my own. I don't know what I'm scared off but I get pains in my chest and a sore tummy on days like this if I try to really engage with the world out there. I'm shaking even thinking about it. xx
ReplyDeleteMy sons are into Farmville as well, they have to keep going back to the computer several times a day to maintain it! Reminds me of Tamagotchis back in the 90s!
ReplyDeleteCarrie, just read your Allotmentherapy blog and was very inspired by your positive experience of gardening and the way it has helped you in your life. Hope you'll soon be feeling better again and enjoying the pleasures of your garden.
Hi Carrie I hope your anxiety fades quickly so you can at least sit and enjoy your garden.
ReplyDeleteHugs Joanne
Oh no not Farmville! OS has hijacked my facebook account to play...
ReplyDeleteHope you are soon back out enjoying your allotment.
Scattered Gardener - Welcome to my blog. Thank you for reading the Allotmentherapy essay, I can't believe how this whole allotment experience has changed my life in such a great way.
ReplyDeleteJoanne - Anxiety is still BAD but I'm okay. Just sore and tired.
Allot of Veg - I KNOW, IT'S ADDICTIVE!! But I do love it and we aren't allowed any livestock on our plots and I have cows and pigs and sheep there and everything grows perfectly!!