Saturday 7 September 2013

Okay, the truth

I hope I have made it really clear that I try to do my gardening as a form of therapy (which I call allotmentherapy and my Dr's have started calling it that too; next stop the Oxford English Dictionary! hehehe); it's a way in which to connect with nature and overcome my depression and anxiety even for a little while. However it is not a panacea! and hasn't been working for me at all recently.

That's why on this blog, you don't get an awful lot of super useful advice about when and how to do this or that, and what varieties of fruit or vegetables are the best (I think that would be very impertinent of me anyway, as you're soil and climate conditions would be different to mine). The joy is finding out what works for you and sharing our trials and tribulations and indeed our successes!

Well the last time I wrote I indicated that I was having problems and since then those problems have gotten worse. Our allotment gardens are so neglected, so huge, wind swept and honestly, just depressing. That is, they are to me and have been for a few good weeks or, let's be truly honest here...months. I haven't even been reading other blogs on gardening never mind thinking about this one for which I have so much love. Andrew has been the one going and trying to stay on top of harvest gluts and bolting veg whilst also trying to guide me through this deeper period of depression. Poor guy.

So today I went. It was damp and empty and we just about got some jobs done before the sky starting crying (lol). Harvesting, composting the sweetcorn, now finished, and a general tidy up. I think that hour was enough for me and I could not cope being on 14b, the sooner we move things out of there and just train our focus on one half plot, the better.

Super quick update
Our kidney bean shaped bench had been stolen :( But the Green Beans are still going strong (I'll talk about them in another post), the parsnips look really healthy, the amount of squashes is smashing, we are getting blueberries (praise be to Zeus, finally) and raspberries and our apples, plums and pears are all....weird (like secret underground layer genetic experiment kind of weird!) Everything else is just ticking along super-ly apart from some of the chard which is bolting but c'est la vie....

I really need to take many more photos but, I guess it will take time...

I've been through these periods many times before and I bounce back so I hope you will stay around and maybe even say hello. A huge thank you to those of you who have sent private emails too! I have been waiting for the right things to say but as each day goes by and I still don't feel quite myself, I fear I have become rude...


Namaste friends and may you be having a better time than me and fond memories of the summer just passed.

8 comments:

  1. Carrie,
    Your plot looks lovely. My depression has been really bad this summer and to top it off I was laid off and am looking for work too. My garden is overgrown and ugly and every time I look at it I feel worse. I wish there was a magic wand for both of us...but for now peace and good luck!
    Kathy

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  2. So sorry things have been going badly for you. I often wonder how you are doing. I fall out of love with my plot and gardening generally from time to time, and it all seems completely overwhelming, although nothing like that which you suffer. But I do find that I come back to it eventually. I do so hope that things improve for you soon. You remain in my thoughts Carrie, and I'm sending you a big cyber hug.

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  3. Allotment thieves are in the same category as slugs. Slimy low lifes. We have had a couple of visitations - one to take the shed window out and rummage about in a shed that if you look through the window obviously has absolutely nothing worth stealing.

    I hope the clouds in your head soon lift and the sun comes out again.

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  4. I know the feeling very well dear Carrie :) depression and anxiety have a lot to answer for lol my plot has remained unvisited for a whole year now and fear the time has come to wind it down. Such a wonder place to help heal the soul but when times become to hard its just a place i dread going to so much effort and hard work wasted, time and weeds wait for no man nor woman lol I too fear my withdrawal from friends, family and blog rude, and to be honest harder with each passing day, but someone once said that your true friends will understand! so from a fellow sufferer i wish you lots of hugs and love be kind to yourself all will work out eventually...............

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  5. Carrie,

    Just thinking about you and hope life is beginning to turn up for you. I send a bouquet of smiles and positive thoughts.

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  6. Yes it has been a great summer for produce! Love your pumpkin! I can see it with wheels......

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