July allotment recap (2/2)

Sunday afternoon saw us return bravely to 24a even though there were more thundery showers foretold by the weatherman. I will admit that I guffawed at the thought as the skies looked beautifully blue with white fluffy clouds and it was warm enough to be working only in a t-shirt. I was soon to be humbled, but in the intervening hours we managed to get some good progress made.

Upon arrival I took a photo of the climbing rose - still in full bloom and with more flower buds coming! To think I have tried to get rid of this plant twice, well again, I sit here red faced. Shame on me.

I took a moment to take in the joy of our apples, the first photos are from the Saturday - It was hard to witness the bird beak damage to some of the best ones that had happened just a day.  I love birds and am happy that the insects were enjoying them (this wasp was drinking away all afternoon) but their mine damn it!

Andrew made the first of the new paths. Here is the evolution of it in photo form..

The planks we edged our beds with 9 yrs ago are rotting and so this summer is all about refurbishment and a little less about the growing. We also decided to make the paths extend right the way round the beds inside of just down the 3 sides. It will be a lot easier to weed and tend and harvest now. Yay.

gosh you can really see how the weather changed over this period - thunder just after I took last photo..

There comes a time when you just have to reprimand yourself for growing things you don't actually want or use!

The red gooseberries that I fought gooseberry saw fly larvae for, got scraped and jabbed all over my arms for, fought the birds for the the few berries we got (still in a bag in the fridge as we aren't fussed on them) are going. I have one cut down to the ground and other still to do, then Andrew will lift the root balls out.

They also really hindered the tending to and harvesting of blueberries, of which I seem to have missed the boat on again. Damn birds just find a way into the cage every time! Next year it will be different.

Taken from Andrew's Instagram (there's a cool filter on it)

There have been some delicious dinners from the produce we have been getting though and I can't complain. Andrew does this lovely side of crushed potatoes with scallions finely chopped, some mushed up garlic and butter all mixed up = yummy :)

And I shall once again, as with every year, remind you that ROASTED beetroot is the way to go - it's so incredible. If you only grow yours to pickle them....shame on you! x

Hugs, have a great weekend
Carrie  x

Before the tummy bug

For the last half of May I was super ill with a terrible doubt of gastroenteritis. Really the realities of it are too gross to talk about but needless to say I was sofa bound for just over a week and it took 3 days before I could eat more than a cracker. I'm better now, that's what matters.

Before that mess we had a lovely, sunny afternoon at both plots for the last time. We've now officially said goodbye to 14b and even got a little refund as we'd recently paid for another year, we had 2 weeks to clear out what we wanted...

Plum poppy looking great bar all the weeds and dead daffodil stems :)

But the first thing I saw on arrival at 14b were the poppies, god I love poppies and my Patty Plum had one in bloom and many to come. The oriental poppy is always a little behind but so many buds 😊. The roses never did well and looked quite dead, bar one that was struggling to produce 2 blooms.

Saved from the plot before the new owners come (wonder when that will be?):

• Posts, fencing, wooden edging boards,  
• hardcore gravel and paving slabs, 
• comfrey plant, my wee red geum (Mrs Bradshaw) and 2 huge box balls, 
• our sanity!

But we had to say goodbye to our:

• blackberries, new happy blackthorn hedge
• cherry tree, damson tree and pear tree?, 
• rhubarb (maybe we could save some?) 
• poppies and rudbeckia (Goldsturm) , two of my favourite plants ever. 

Not to mention all the other bits and pieces. We couldn't lift them or a lot of other plants as we simply had no where to put them and silly emotional me had a wee cry. Though I have been promised a wee flower area on the back patio.

Blackberries alive with bees, rhubarb past it's best and some lovely weeds

One more thing - some damned brute had broken part of our cool artisan 14b sign. Andrew had made it with glass test tubes and they were super sturdy and we liked it...and ggrrr. Well we won't be needing it now anyway, I guess but it's the principal.

grrr

It's all about 24a from now on.

My mosaic number, beautiful bought tiles and an 'A' etched by Andrew on slate

I spent my time weeding 24a whilst Andrew did all the heavy lifting and moving from 14b. The poor plot had been a little neglected in the choking weed department and it's what I'm comfortable with at the moment. For a goodly while now I simply haven't had the confidence to plant things - my anxiety disorder is winning these days - boo hiss.

Blueberries, gooseberries and apples

Weeding in and around the blueberries and gooseberries I was amazed to find so many well developed berries - we need to get them netted as the birds are pesky pilferers and can strip all the bushes in a day! The apples either side of the fruit arch are also doing really good.

I do wish we had of got rid of the gooseberries over the redcurrant bush (as I actually like redcurrants) but Andrew has plans for a raspberry bed, though maybe it ought to be a rhubarb bed... I'm just thinking out loud.

oh yes, don't mind if I do

All this work was making us hungry and Andrew went up to the community centre and got two of these, yum! Dark chocolate chip shortbread squares, oh my, they were delicious.

More next time, hugs,
Carrie

Less is more

That's it, we are giving up 14b.

a sad farewell

I do write this with a slightly heavy heart as no one wants to feel a failure, but we have finally come to our senses and realised we are not superhuman and that hell of a half plot must exit our lives. 24a will always be our first and true love and now we are going to dedicate our allotmenteering time to it alone.

3 hours of virtual non-stop work and this is all I got weeded of the hell plot.

We are 9 yrs into our allotment journey now and still enjoy it, however, we have other passions too and hate the feeling of being obliged to go and work in misery in an area we can't stay on top on. From now on we will use our time for more us time; hiking and day trips to the beach with Toby etc.

We're in a transitional year on 24a anyway - paths need made, others need fixed up; bed edging has rotted in practically every place and the apple arch needs refurbished too.

A24a and Toby with his beloved ball :)

I'm just madly in love with all the apple blossom this year

Some seeds have been planted and are growing well, some were direct sown last Sunday - we are still growing people (😀 ), we are simply cutting back and concentrating on what we actually need and use every year.

So dead raspberries and a hated spiky nightmare of a redcurrant plant are gone! Plus we have some big pots to fill with some beloved plants from 14b - it's going to be a busy Saturday :)

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Plus, I hate ignoring the elephant in the room....I'm ill, still very ill indeed to be honest and struggling. Yes, I want to immerse myself in nature whenever, however I can but it can't stress me out. Now, things are changing and ADVENTURE AWAITS.

Love and hugs
Carrie

Photo update from last weekend

'Things' have not been good inside the head of your exhausted writer, my dear friends. The debilitation of Depression, Anxiety and BPD is real, really real and I have been in my own personal Hades for quite some times now. I rarely talk to anyone or go outside and life without Maggie is still almost unbearable. So forgive me for the lack of blog posts or comments in fact, if you have a blog yourself, I just haven't been able to think properly - I am experiencing a moment of clarity and am devoting it to this space. Little dialogue but lots of photos....these were the plots last Sunday.

24a is the real producer and it was time for some constructive deconstruction (you know I love that), as the courgettes, sweetcorn and climbing french beans are all finished now and needed composting. Sadly all our leeks had bolted too so 'goodbye' (the plot smelt like soup all afternoon!)

14b is the embarrassing little sister, going through her grunge teenage years and so unkempt but beautiful underneath it all. It gifted us some lovely squashes that we are eating now and loving. Here's Andrew's gorgeous photo of them.

https://www.instagram.com/andrewgault_/

Anyway we focused, as I said on the finished veggie beds on 24a and got as much done as we could before I just couldn't take anymore....

I tackled the bean wigwam and weeded the whole bed .I was so happy to find this little fellow/lady? ladybird which I put in a cosy spot on it's leaf. I LOVE ladybirds!

By that stage we stopped for tea and listened to the crazy lady pheasants running and squawking about. Andrew had by this time cleared the last courgette plants (one last wee harvest first!) and all those sweetcorn stalks. The sweetcorn this year was amazing - Swift F1 as always but a great year!

Back to it and the leeks were lifted (sadly) and composted whilst I did some really quite pointless weeding of the paths which had gotten grassy and slippy up by the arch.  I also noted that the broccoli and even the purple sprouting broccoli  had bolted! What the heck!! The carrots had carrot fly *sad face*, but the companion plants were very happy...


















Andrew prepared the #1 bed for mulching with our glorious well rotted horse manure, look dear friend, I know you, as a true plotter will appreciate the wonder of our manure bin....

How lovely to watch such hard work, hahaa.

Sadly we didn't get to finish the #2 bed as I needed home but! it was fabulous to be there once again (bar seeing Maggie everywhere and her bowl sitting out for her). I am thankful for the good times and my amazing hubby who never gives up on me. Let's hope we have another nice wee time to treasure this weekend.

Best wishes to you all,
Hugs
Carrie xx

P.S. Apologises for the poor photos at times, these are all unedited and from my phone (apart from Andrew's one - it's perfect) x

The clock keeps ticking

It was been a week and life goes on, as of course it should and indeed, must. These past few days have been so terribly painful that I have found myself numb to feelings and confused by the utter silence I have been living in. Andrew goes off to work and I am completely alone now.

I hear her, well, I think do, every now and then and find that I still walk looking down at my feet (so we don't get entangled going back and forth), though she is not there. Her living room bed is now on top of the dining room one, I have gotten rid of all the food stuffs that were for her but the toys lie where they last fell and I can't bear to put her drink bowl and food bowl away yet.  I guess these things will simply take time.

That small collar with her name tag sits beside an old favourite black and white photo of her.

On a good note, I am more interested in the allotment now and have been there a few times since last Friday. Now it's a place of sweet Maggie flavoured memories and particularity of her last day, where she dandered about and lay in the sun before the trip to the vet.

The harvests have been prolific but the broad beans and the mangetout are now finished and some things such as the leeks and the broccoli have started to bolt. Our carrots have however been a triumph and after a few years of lament over them, we are certainly glad of success.

I haven't a photo but the Echlinville apple espaliers had their first harvest and a pie by Mamma G was duly made = darn good apples! There are more, so next time I'll give cooking with them a go.

Back again on Sunday and it was incredible how small courgettes the day before had become marrows! There were so many we had to give more than half away, literally carrying them to another plot holder's car and setting them down with their own harvest. Then the garlic was cleaned and it's perfect again, as each year so far - we have been so lucky.

Tonight were having more of our own vegetables, every meal has had organic, lottie-grown produce in it this week and so in an hour or so, it will be roasted root vegetables and a little chicken - I'm hungry! My appetite came back today and I am ready for a healthy feast :)

With love and thanks for your condolences last week,

Your Carrie x

Wabi-Sabi

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Life, I just don't 'get' it, why is it so hard, so painful, so full of angst and disappointment? There's something in me that constantly wants it to change; the struggles are too great (and as my personal troubles are in my brain, no one can truly free me from that consistent fight), and the beauty, hard to find. I need a break, I think we all do.

The allotment called to me last Saturday and I answered; longing to find answers, peace, anywhere I may find it. Andrew and Maggie were happy to have me around and I took things slow, even stopping for tea and a snack along the way.

24a - left side and right :)

wild flowers from the hedgerow and time for a break

I couldn't help but tackle some of the worst areas. Yes, you know where....14b. I spent an hour clearing big weeds, some taller than me and many stronger too. It did feel good to make a difference and now the little squashes are going to get more light and room and nutrients. They best taste good!

before and after - squash patch 14b

Sad thing is I know that the next time I go back there is much more of this battle with nature to come. It just keeps coming, I just keep ultimately losing. Oh and of course there's the anxiety and depression to continue fighting whilst I'm there. It feels like I live life as though I'm walking on paper thin tissue paper; always the fear of the fall through and the fall out.

Good things did happen. Andrew pruned the gooseberry patch and the Echlinville apples were finally tided up; the espaliered nature of them is so pleasing to the eye. I know for certain that I felt good being useful for a while. And there was no one else there, just lots of birds, some sweetly singing, many squawking.

Consulting the Dr. and getting the espaliers done right!

I got to harvest the first of our blueberries, and red gooseberries, ha! - All for us and not one for those pesky pilfering, no good birds. Years, it's been years since we had any but the fruit cage has worked wonders and it's almost too much, haha.
Anxiety did take over, naturally. Strong feelings of paranoia and of just shear embarrassment at being me and outside of the house. That saw me going home but Andrew soldiered on :)

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I don't know where I am in this world, a seed poorly nurtured, grown up deficient in what it needed and now, an imperfect plant with so many problems that if you had me in your garden or plot, you'd have no hesitation in ripping me out.
Thank goodness Andrew sees through that, maybe he loves the challenge of growing and helping me, maybe he sees beauty in the ugly. I'm just so thankful for him (and the delicious harvests). xx

Yours
Carrie x

Starting over or...

* Personally - I've been falling down a lot (metaphorically) recently and the allotment has not been a place of much therapy; life has seemed harder and more cruel in the past days, especially at the weekend and I just feel I would rather sleep all the time than have to face reality.

BUT...still I get up every day and I try. I try to read, to clean, to be alive to the beauty in the world.

* In Allotment terms -  The work on 14b has well and truly begun. Andrew has decided this is going to be his challenge and he's already made a lot of headway. You know I have been so ashamed of the place that never a photo is taken but this is where we are at at present. (Well, after I took this the apple tree was disposed off too and the digging began).

top of 14b - the big cultivated area is where the squash bed was, the rhubarb will be staying 

I'll get Andrew to draw me a 'proposed plan' for the space; I'll share it when he gets round to it.

Stunning sunflower on 14b

I think it's all down to Autumn, that time of year when there is work to be done; that sort I like to call 'constructive deconstruction'. There are plants to be lifted, finished crops to be cleared and bare soil is once again seen, leaving us with fresh thoughts of the future. Composting goes into overdrive with all the last grass cuttings and plants now past it; this is the time we get horse manure from the stables and everything seems to take on a glow, a radiance that suggests yes winter is coming but with cosy nights and chances to dream. The fact that the compost heap is warm to the touch is quite magical too.

Horse manure on left, general compost heap on right with compost bin in front (why?...I don't know)

The early nights are coming in and the skies recently have been beautiful, we've seen a few from the plots, whether we are still working there or simply taking Maggie for a walk. We're also eating those delicious pumpkins and lots of beetroot - growing your own ties you into the seasons and these food stuffs feel like such a treat right now.

Our turnips were a bit of a disaster and we let them get too big, too woody and bug eaten. I lifted them all and said goodbye. I have to say though that it was a joy to see that area cleared and I got all those blasted big weeds too. As we look back over the year, we are learning (we are always learning) about the space we use for various crops and how 2 courgette plants are more than enough for us, we need to grow less potatoes too as we have had way too many, soft fruits do not work well for us (though we have a plan) and we really want to try asparagus again...see, the bare soil can be exciting.

Really disgusting rotten turnip; a whole wheelbarrow of unuseable turnips; weeds and a sneaky carrot!

before and after

I shall add my photos now, I think I have waffled enough. It's simply one of those days were I so want to talk to you but my mind is just wandering. In the next days I will have some little vignettes from around the field too, I hope you stay tuned for that.

Maggie laughing :)

Love and hugs

Your Carrie

Celebratory Photograph Time!

Yes, it's the morning after the morning before and it did really happen - I was at the lottie yesterday! I still can't quite believe it and I feel so scared at the idea of going alone again that I can't quite understand from whence the strength came from before! Or was it total insanity that grasped me and took me on my 2 hrs long adventure?!

I feel everything about this whole surprising, marvelous event deserves an exclamation mark!

Here, let me share my photos with you, put them out into the world so that it can be seen, remembered and one day, attempted again (eek!)!

And there she was 24a in all her welcoming glory :)

Bed #1 - lettuces, courgettes, sweetcorn, chard, purple sprouting broccoli

Bed #2 - loads of beetroot (various different colours), celeriac, turnips, carrots, parsnips

Blueberries coming into colour under netting - ha, take that pigeons!

Bed #4 - garlic, broad beans, mangetout, french climbing beans

Some of the many flowers that are in bloom, or coming into bloom :) This really makes me happy as I saw so many bees and butterflies on them whilst I was there. I love our plot to be full of colour and helpful insects. Cornflower (purple), dahlia, red velvet rose, marigold, california poppies.

A good hour of my time was devoted to this path and making it safe. All I had was a push mower, hand scissors and my grit and determination. Note how Maggie is NO help :)

2 hrs later and look how sleepy Maggie is (the cheek of her, she didn't do anything!). One last look back and what a happy little sight the marigolds on the shelf under the shed window are :)

All in all I am pleased I pushed and today I have plans for the back garden. Thank you for your comments on the last post by the way and if you are a Facebook follower xxx Harvest photos next time and I have some lovely Mount Stewart nature photos from the weekend too.

Hugs and Love

Carrie x