I can't stop sleeping all the time; fearing the housework that is being neglected; worrying that the dog needs more playtime from me. I can't stop feeling so empty and depressed, uninterested in life and just wishing I could hide until it's all over.
Plus, the world has become a scary, unstable place to match that which is in my head. My mental health has had a referendum and decided to truly co-ordinate and gang up against - trample any good thought or feeling I may hope to have. It's a nightmare of depression, anxiety, panic attacks and utter confusion all day, everyday.
Sorry friends. I have stories and many glorious scenes to share with you from our wee trip to Tenerife. Toby is delightful and I must update you. Plus the snowdrops are still coming out and though no hope has been felt in their white flowers this time (and the fact that the patch is spreading), there are many things planned for this spring that I ought to be excited about.
I'm still here, still fighting and will write soon.
It's going to be OK, right?
C x
It's going to be ok x
ReplyDeleteI love you hunny xx
DeleteI'm sorry to read that you're not feeling too good. I'm sure that the time of year and weather don't help. Nor does the crazy world which has made everyone a bit edgy and uncertain.
ReplyDeleteLook forward to spring when we can get back on our allotments and in our gardens, that has to be worth looking forward to.
Take care, and hugs, Flighty xx
Flighty, you're the loveliest. Thank you and all those seeds you sent me will bring cheer, I'm sure xx
DeleteIt is going to be okay. Everything is cattywhompus and the scary bits can easily run rampant in my mind. But little bits of beauty & grace and each day, putting one foot in front of the other (even if only to the kitchen), is still moving forward. Big hugs! xoxo Chels
ReplyDeleteThank you! That's how I try to think, always moving forward no matter how hard. Plus honouring where I am everyday and how it changes and that's ok. GRACE is the word xxxx
DeleteHold on Carrie - this too will pass and think on your memories of warmth and holidays
ReplyDeleteThank you so much Mary. Photos are so important to remind me I have had adventures and there is beauty in the world. xx
DeleteHold on Carrie - this too will pass
ReplyDeleteI neverly got 'this too shall pass' tattooed on my wrist. I need that reminder, thank you xxx
DeleteIt will definitely be OK. As for housework it's not something worth worrying about. Your target should be to play with Toby. If that is too muchat the moment start with lots of fuddles.
ReplyDeleteOh he is getting so many cuddles! Thank you for your words Sue xxx
DeleteAh, Carrie. You've been on this roller coaster before and I do hope you'll hang in there until you're through the dark days. That darling Toby will help. Spring will help. Your wonderful Andrew, too. And soon as you're up to it, you know we want to hear all about Tenerife! Many hugs, friend.
ReplyDeleteIt IS going to be OK, it really is. All the scary stuff in the news is the newsworthy stuff that sells papers and airtime. Have you noticed the hundreds of thousands of good people protesting and standing up to speak against the bad stuff. I have been astonished lately how many good, loving people there are all over the world. It's easy to forget. So leave the exterior scary stuff to others and remember how lovely your own personal little bit of the universe is. Spring is on its way - hold on. Lynda xxxxx
ReplyDelete