The lost long weekend

I fear the allotment may think I have abandoned it, poor thing. The bank holiday weekend we just had ought to have seen me there with my gardening gloves on and my hands busy in weed pulling and seed planting. Alas it was not to be as my mental health took a terrible nose dive and I was lucky to see the sunshine through the half drawn blinds.

Mental breakdowns don't care if the weather is stunning and you have hopes and made plans. Mental breakdowns suck. They leave me exhausted beyond words and so utterly depressed that my body just can't do a thing and I end up so frustrated and angry that any energy I did have gets burned up and I am left with sleep as my only option! Arrghhh.

So instead of tending my plot I slept. Andrew managed to get there for short periods whilst I was 'busy' sleeping and it is looking quite good. It's a miracle!

I am so glad I used a Saturday a few weeks back to plant up my tiered flower pot stand, these babies have given me hope and joy every day. Yesterday I managed to drag myself out of the house to the back garden and sit by them for a while - a little burst of ecotherapy goes a long way.

I SHALL see my plot this week at some point, I miss it and I miss being able to share the goings on with you.

But already I have been outside today with my camera and as soon as I am finished here, out I shall go again and get me more Vitamin D 😊

Hopefully I shall write again soon
Your Carrie x

Three Good Days

As anyone with a chronic illness will testify, good days are hard to come by; like trains they are often nowhere in sight and instead you must take the crappy alternative bus service and make do with getting through the journey of the day. A lot of the time, it can even be a little scary to feel 'good' as you just keep wondering when it's going to be pulled from under you and in my case, a good day is often followed by many bad ones.

Well, let's just look at Saturday and Sunday forget Monday (yesterday, it sucked) and move straight onto today.

OK how you look at a good day may differ from mine. On Saturday I went outside! That was a great thing in itself -  I was able to go to IKEA, that haven of flat-pack and very clever ideas and then on to my favourite cafe/art gallery.

On Sunday afternoon and early evening I spent the day working in the back garden with my hubby. In fact I was in the hubby's shed, potting up more colourful flowers, re-potting a bit of mint that I saved and is growing really well and tidying a little, haha.

My tiered garden and some details of flowers in bloom below
That space at the bottom is for the mixed leaves mix I have germinating

Andrew cut back the hedges and wall coverage - it's looking good out there :) The secret Japanese tea room is beautifully sheltered and very calming.

Today I read and I cleaned. I got the downstairs vacuumed and tidied and I scrubbed my kitchen floor and cleaned the surfaces and did washing (it's drying on the line) and dishes and played with Toby. And I felt able to think straight enough to write this blog, it's a miracle! 😀

Hugs
Carrie xx