In praise

I made it to the allotments (despite my nervousness and hayfever), for the first time I've in goodness knows how many weeks. And boy did it feel good! :) 

A lot has changed in my time away and if I simply focus in on our plots, the change has been impressive and productive. The less said about those plots around us, the better. 

That's a white sky that won't quit!

Andrew has gallantly raised all our seedlings and defended them best he could, alone. He has been steadfast in keeping things going even whilst the wind and rain and low temperatures and bloody foes (sawfly, slugs, birds and weeds etc) have done their best to destroy his work and his soul. But his sweat and toil has not been in vain.

Look (and maybe marvel, as I did) at the produce we have growing. Salivate at the homemade compost and cry with me at the demise of Alan the gnome. All emotion is found here, it's a roller coaster.

The roots bed is lovely good, black gold which is full of life, Alan who was attacked by the wind and lost his legs

So the main jobs this Saturday were getting the peas in, weeding like our lives depended on it and creating the path (and border edge) between the two flower beds. The weather was dry, muggy and cloudy, hence the mad variation in my photography saturation levels and well, there quality too. Being slightly damp (us ladies don't sweat), itchy and sneeze-y does not a happy or artistic Carrie make, but I have tried and that's what matters. 

Though I can't believe I didn't take a photo of the new border edge Andrew put in on the left bed - ggrrr.

The permanent flower bed needs to get new plants as most have been on the plots from the very beginning and moved to 14b when we took it over. I'm really rather annoyed I missed the plum Poppy in it's glory but the red ones are still going strong and the geum beside them has never been so prolific. The cutting flower bed isn't too bad, no diseases I could spot and I look forward to having some cosmos in the house, one day :)

I think this is enough for my first time back in a while. I hope to be a better blogger and memory capturer once my hayfever is sorted out! There is much to show you here at the house too :)

Love and best wishes
Carrie

P.S. We were in Prague for our 10th Wedding anniversary a couple of weeks ago. If any of the photos turn out okay, I'll share them. We had a lovely time, it's a super place to visit. 

Moment of clarity

The words come to me on the edge of sleep. They are eloquent and flowing; exactly describing how I feel, what has been happening; and they hold within them the precise emotions and maybe some of that quirkiness laying deep inside me.

But then, as it has been for weeks now, I come to this page and the cursor blinks on a white expanse that I am too daunted to make a mark on. I can't think straight, the words are so muddled and I feel intimated, plus there's the undeniable fact that I really don't have anything worth sharing. I haven't been to the allotment for a while now, the seedlings here at the house are growing on and disappearing as Andrew continues to tend the plots alone.

Okay, the weather has been a major problem and this is by far the worst year we've experienced in growing our own but honestly, I can't blame that alone. I have been terribly ill with a massive breakdown so severe I have had great trouble eating, talking, walking, following a train of thought and even caring about life at all. It has been hell and not just for me.

I take photos and they stay in the camera, I receive a stunning wooden planter from The Posh Shed Company and I simply can't write an easy review about how beautifully made it is. The act of blogging has become a rod for my back and boy do I thrash myself with it. I feel pathetic, incomprehensible and plain unworthy of being seen or heard.

Enough with the depression and anxiety already; I can't cope and I can't bare to lose any more friends and opportunities. We only get one life and damn it, the clock is ticking.

little snippets of today at home

Hugs,
Carrie