An Invisible Spring

The fire has been quashed in the belly by the ever present suffocating dense layer of white cloud I see everyday. We are lucky in terms of no snow or floods here but still this coldness never recedes the sky is only occasionally blue in tiny blotches and I feel so terribly empty inside.

It's a daily battle with myself to try and inject some hope that the better weather will come around. We don't see a point to planting seeds and why go to the plot when it is so sodden and I freeze in next to no time. Mother Nature and Ecotherapy are really toying with me these past weeks and the feeling is like that of being winded by a punch to the torso.

Then of course I feel guilty for being so pathetic when there are millions of people worse off than me sitting here in my warm home, safe and with access to all the water and food I need. I guess this is just how depression works, right?

We have broad beans, lettuce and sweet peas in our potting shed (kept warmer or at least frost free by a church candle burning inside it).  I know the garlic is ready to go as are the potatoes which are always planted on St Patrick's Day but not this year. We should have beetroot sown and leeks and lots more including flowers but what's the point; the weatherman said this cold and damp will probably last until the end of April.

My Spring is hiding and I need her. 

This was us last year, look at all that sun and the nice dry soil *sigh* .....

I hope for you at the weather is treating your area better and you still have that glow I so long for, that flicker of joy in the new life that is appearing, that tinge of hope for a great year now winter has passed. I am making more arty things these days instead and trying hard to connect with people in the flesh - keep the hope alive my friends!

Hugs

St Patrick's Day

Oh what a let down, it was all going so well until yesterday when it rained, then there was sleet then snow and rain all day, all night :( St Patrick's Day is our traditional day for planting the spuds but no, when we arrived at the allotment (bright and early - go us!) the paths were enough of a giveaway - the ground was sodden. If you are into rotten potatoes, fine go ahead but I kind of like them to be edible.

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So I would like to share with you our back garden instead :)  There have been some improvements and the swelling of buds and bulbs has been bring joy and loads of birds. Oh yes! we are officially on the map as the place to get your seeds and fat balls.

The hard landscaping

I am so lucky in my 'catch'; my hubby can lift his hand to anything and does each and every thing he puts his mind to with perfection. It's actually a little bit annoying at times that he can be so awesome, ggrrrr BUT he does remind me of my Big Papa in this way and that causes me to love him even more!  Our main trees and bamboos are finally settled and starting to grow; I feel this summer will be luscious.

He made this >

A super fab screen to stop over-looking

And we have further plans to make this area fabulous. Number one is getting rid of that umbrella.

Plus look at how happy our Christmas boxes and beech hedge is looking; happy and healthy and if I could use my nostrils....supposedly the Christmas box smelt wondrous.

The Acer buds, beech hedge bud profusion and cherry blossoms

The pretties that bring joy

Look at the joy, the yellow shiny bright joy that is the glorious tete-a-tete, on mass it is a happy pill that works through you merely seeing them. Of course the tulips are coming too and I am really looking forward to that. In the photo below the black pot has some long forgotten tete-a-tetes that had sprouted in the shed :) And those terracotta pots are going to be full of tulips.

Then over in the tea garden haven the snow drops are slowly giving way to the colourful crocuses. 

Garden accessories (very necessary for maximum enjoyment!)

We finally bought ourselves a little bistro set for the tea garden, it's only taken what feels like forever! We got this little marvel for a steal in a huge Scandinavian shop whose colours are blue and yellow and they love their meatballs....I hope you get my drift.

I was also very fortunate to be sent these little beauties from the lovely people at Jo Alexander. And yes, they were a gift in turn for a wee name drop but oh I do so love them. This is my style - simple, elegant and timeless. I look forward to long lazy nights outside, with wine at our bistro set with candle light; I already have quite a number that hang down from the pergola but I am a fan of lights dotted in the foliage.

Hugs, more soon,

Under a rock somewhere

I haven't seen much of the world at all since I last wrote, never mind do any gardening. I have a myriad of reasons for this, none of them exciting :

• The weather has been terrible
• I threw myself into my crafty works like a maniac
• I had a whopping 3 day Migraine
• I've had the Flu for over 4 days now
• My depression has deepened

My eyes have literally been closed (migraines totally suck) but also, figuratively my depression has closed my eyes to hope.

Usually in these dark, shadowy passages I find solace in dreaming of better days, of looking at stunning photographs and thinking of beautiful new springy days and long summer evenings. But this week I have been too ill and these thoughts and images merely mock me; instead I have been only looking to sleep to save my self from harm; to pass the time. 

I had written a good few posts here but they all ended up getting deleted. However in seeing my psychiatrist on Thursday it was made clear to me that this very blog is important and I should keep writing, not just for me but for others. My psychiatrist is very interested in gardening (and asks for tips after sessions) but as usual hadn't heard of Ecotherapy, though he believes in it wholeheartedly.

He told me I really ought to be true, write about my illness and how the lottie helps but also how it isn't a panacea,  just another useful tool (or weapon). He said that maybe this was my role in life - to do my bit to lift stigma, to be honest.

So here I am doing just that - telling the truth. I am a human/slug hybrid. Yep, that can be the only real explanation for all this slime coming out my nose and being coughed up, the nasty cold sweat on my forehead and my slow movements. The enemy has attacked. And the thing with enemies (and slugs in general) is that they are tricksy and catch you out when you least expect it - search, lift, clear everything in sight and there will still be one or two under a rock somewhere, just waiting, silently plotting.... 

Constant high alert is futile and exhausting, sometimes life just throws a few juicy slugs in our faces and stuffs one down our throats. It's disgusting, demoralising, depressing - but it isn't poisonous and I will be back!

Spring time = smiles

I can barely believe March is here, but the birds are singing so sweetly, the newsman said it was Spring now and so many flowers and trees are coming back to life >
to the allotment we go !!! :)

Hugs galore and may happiness be in your heart

Excellent progress on the plots

First off I want to tell you it was snowing when we went to the lottie on Saturday - we are so hardcore!! Okay so it was hardly anything but at least it shows our commitment and it could have got bad; we didn't know, we didn't care.

I managed to finish the wedding of the flower bed - hurrah. There was one utterly gross bit there in front of the very faded sign and the pointy bit... There was 5, yes count them, 5 hand trowels full of maggots. Boke! They were wiggly and fat and I couldn't find what they were eating but it was a moment of pure 'I am woman, hear me roar!' - I didn't even squeal (though I felt like it inside). Now I really need to sort out the grassy paths and make a new sign, then I'll be much happier

Raspberries moved

Andrew has wanted to do this for a while now as the summer raspberries were really awful to harvest over on 24a with the trees blocking access down one side. Plus they were throwing out new shoots into the paths over there and needed a lot more room. I am so impressed that he did all this by himself and the berries will be easier to pick and protect - I swear, netting is going up and "birds! listen up; they're mine this year!"

Strawberries Weeded

I took on the task of weeding the Strawberry bed. It doesn't look that awful but it was and the pure clay that is in there was a nightmare on the trowel; my new cotton gloves were caked in it, I really need plastic ones or something more manly, but my hands are tiny. We used to have asparagus in here, but we're thinking that we may put some new crowns into the vacated summer raspberry bed. When it was an asparagus bed loads of compost, sand and grit was worked into this soil and it was delightful - the blasted rain and subsequent flooding of the field every winter seems to have removed all that goodness and the soil is simply only good for making pots or bricks - arrghh. I ended up getting very peeved and chucked loads of clumps into the far hedgerow.

We didn't (either of us) see a single worm during all this digging - isn't that just awful? Not one. But the new growth particularly in the flower bed has brought us many a smile. The narcissus tete-a-tete's continue to bloom double headed and those spots of yellow are joy itself. And the red rose has gorgeous new shoots coming and looks so healthy - beware aphids, I already have my eyes on the lookout for any signs of you - keep out!

Lastly I must share this sad sight. One of our gnomes has died in a most gruesome manner, falling off a high post (he ought not to have been there in the first place, just saying, cough, cough) and like Humpty Dumpty, he was just beyond help. As a dedication to his memory he shall be used as crocks in the bottom of the next pot we plant up. Farewell little friend......

 Hugs and love

An Allotment Check-up

We had an allotment 'date' last Friday, as Andrew had taken a much needed day off :) I painted inside the shed and then got very panicky, feeling cooped up alone while he was over on the other half plot working away. So after a wee trip out for a warm drink and and sit down together I felt better, much better and we went back and got to work again together.

Andrew planted 3 blackthorn trees = our very own sloe berries for the traditional lottie sloe gin :) They will also act as a much needed screen up at the top of 14b, by the compost bins. I did take a photo but it's awful and do you really want to see 3 brown twigs in a row in brown soil??

He also cut back and tied in the blackberry, which was something I started a few months back but my double vision was sort of a hazard, hahaha. It looked like I'd  had a fight with a crazy litter of cats; so many big cuts and blood on my gloves. Still, as least I tried. Here's Andrew glorious work though....

the blackberry all tied in for the season ahead

I am so looking forward to more jam but also I found this blackberry frozen yogurt recipe on Pinterest.

I continued with the incredible task of weeding the main flower bed. It is just infested with weeds, yes some would be our own but I swear most are from the 3 plots that surround us - they have been abandoned for about a year now and do nothing but grow weeds and then spread them all over the darn place - usually right slap bang into our plots! Oh if only all vegetables and fruit were so prolific.

I'm very near to being finished (though as you'll know yourself, I probably think I'm finished when I need to start all over again) and it looks good. We have a lot of tulips and daffodils coming through and the first little Narcissus 'Tete-a-tete' was in flower. Look! doesn't it fill you heart with joy?

Happiness is yellow :)

I also loved this daisy, I can't help myself...

I love daisies, I can't help myself :)

Prepare for a little rant now, just my personal view point.....

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I am annoyed today, very annoyed. A letter arrived from the Council and they have decided to up our rent by a whooping 14%! I wouldn't mind so much if the Council was actually good at helping us and providing us with the basic necessities but they don't...

* The fields have no proper drainage and many plots are flooded, even as I weeded, going half a hand fork in depth the soil, I was encountering pools of water! Our whole allotment has been double dug and has raised beds, plus we have spent so much money on grit and topsoil and getting great manure to improve everything, best we can. It really feels pointless.

*They do not look after the roads. Look at them! never mind that the paths between plots are so slippery (see above) that I am scared to walk around, now there is no way I could go to the Allotment Gardens alone if I wanted to - the roads aren't even safe for me. 

Road between field A and B.

*There is no basic security in place, not a good fence or even the improved hedges (to also act as wind breaks) that were meant to be put in. People can just walk in nilly willy if they want to and it's going to get worse if rumours are true. There is a new community building being built just above the allotment grounds and I have been told by many that access to it from the village is through the centre of the allotment gardens. I hope this isn't true.

*We do not get the Council green waste we were promised over and over; there are no skip days any more to safely dispose of our rubbish and proper management of the plots in terms of so many abandoned ones, is ridiculous whilst there is still a huge waiting list. I am sickened, utterly downhearted.

But I must end on a happy note - 

Look at the rhurbab and the honeysuckle, plus the broad bean seeds have been planted and the garlic looks amazing (but I can't find the photo!)

What are you up too?? Is it starting to feel springy where you are???

Woooo Hooo I'm a guest blogger

I have to share the news cause life has been super tough this year so far and this has made me quite pleased indeed. I was contacted my Thompson and Morgan seeds and asked if I would write a blog post for them on Ecotherapy. Now it must be said, I get contacted by people a lot wanting me to big up their products or shops but I decline with thanks. This time though the lady I was speaking with, Rebecca, was a delight and she actually got me and asked my to write about my passion; to share the idea that gardening could help your low mood, anxiety levels and stress. So I said " YES, PLEASE"

Click the link and see :)
http://blog.thompson-morgan.com/guest-blog/under-the-weather/

oh and if you truly love me, I would exchange free hugs and kisses for a comment left other there *shy smile*.

Thank you and have a fab day - it's sunny here - hurrah.
Love ...

Looking longingly at Friday

Oh this weather is a killer! We didn't manage to get to the lottie at all last weekend and this weekend looks crappy too - but we have hope for Friday :) Always with the hope, it's a gardener's mantra. Painting to be done, beds to get sorted and seeds to be sown =  happy times and spring is coming.

So, sadly I have little to show you but I shall get you up to date with the shed make over and the work Andrew has done outside in the mud.

Second coat in some places but it's really starting to take shape and I have been buying some accessories for it and making some too :) I will come together in time and it shall be glorious!

Andrew dug up our huge rhubarb and spilt it in two, planting them over at the top of 14b. We are going to make that whole area a fabulous non-fussy place with plants that don't need moving and a purposely wilder feel with our new round bed up there. We are so glad the ground up there has been covered with carpet since we got it - so easy to dig and hardly any weeds able to take hold (though now I've said that we shall return to find the place a mess of dandelions, right?? I've just jinxed myself).

He has also tidied up that mess of a flower bed and put mysterious posts into the ground just to the left, hummmm.....

Where that large rhubarb was (in the coffin bed) we now have our third Blueberry bush - hoorah!!! That 3rd bush has been sitting along there since we left Mamma G's to move into our new house and now, finally it has a permanent home. Plus we are going to cover this bed with a cage of netting to try and keep those pesky berry stealing birds out - I shall have my own Blueberries this year! Huzzah!!

I have started a Pinterest page for allotment produce and ingredients. Ohhh I have desires to go mad and make as much as humanly possible this year.

I shall take photos of my accessories when we do get back there, as I know you can't contain your excitement  - I can feel it through the net, haha. My fingers are itching to get painting again, white, bright, happy white!!!

It's not January anymore

Yes!! Today saw the start of the year (January is a bad word in my mind - I try to ignore it with all my might) February is here my friends and I can barely stand the joy. It's only a wee month and then bam! it's March etc...

For this auspicious occasion I went out into the garden, simply desperate to find springy-ness and hope for the year to perk me up. Here is what I saw....

So happy the Beech hedge is filling out and the box hedge is smelling fabulous and looking so healthy :)

 Yes! Big, fat, juicy tulip bulbs are popping through all over the place :)

 AIliums and lots of tete-a-tete bulbs have poked through and are looking super :)

 See? more!!! ;) Plus the Jasmine is happy and grew so much last year - I have happy tingly feelings :)

 Still the snowdrops keep coming; so delicate and so very white they glow :)

And the winter flowering cherry has been in bud for ever, I love it but never more so with the blue sky behind it -  blue sky is the bestest thing ever :)

I am smiling a lot today as you may have noticed and the weather looks okay for tomorrow too = Allotment Time!! Happy Days :)

Love and hugs and Happy February to you :)

Our Shed Makeover pt1

Oh my the weather!! If you haven't already suffocated and frozen under the snow, then I guess you are like us and are just swimming along the streets and enjoying the glorious mud :) Yay!!  Either way I am sure the vast majority of you are feeling the low of not being able to do the gardening - goodness we can't even dig the soil here; getting to the plot from the car park is scary and exhausting enough, then the spade just gets sucked down into the depths of the earth by the 'quicksoil' (like quicksand but not really) and then you just want to cry but it's too cold and the tears freeze in your eyes and now you can't see, ho hum :( You become your very own plot Scarecrow.....

So here are some catch up photos of the plot from the last time I actually did any work and from the day when Andrew took me down to see his hard work inside in the shed.

The 29th of December - Andrew decided to rip off the big collapsible bench from the front of the shed and as it turns out, he did it just in time! The wood below was beginning to rot! This led to a furious conversation where we shared loads of ideas we had been playing with in our noggins and ultimately it was decided to turn the shed into a cosy hideaway.  Just like the Pinterest board I have been creating for ages now :D

First we needed to protect what we had so it was off to get paint and filler we went.... (all this took probably as long as it has taken to write it down).

You may like to see just how happy painting a shed can make a person - oh yes, just get some music on in those headphones and groove my friend - dance like no one is watching and what not. I also think it is highly important to choose a colour that complements your nail varnish and if possible, one that is the same colour as your handbag, lol. (Seriously we only noticed that it was exactly the same as my bag when we were leaving).

Ohhhh, look a  before and after type photo - really I want to get the rest painted but painting in the rain and gale force winds is not a good idea (so I hear), especially when the paint is water based.

During this day and the following when I was extremely ill with man flu/ the end of the real flu, Andrew was down there alone cleaning out the shed and then inside our shed here at the house being very manly with wood and power tools :) He built the basis of the best cosy shed interior ever!! The first photo in the following series was mind blowing but then it got better - eeek!!

So much stuff was able to go to the dump, lots came up here to the house where it will actually be used and the rest has been (very cleverly) hidden away in some super amazing storage. Yes everything we need is still in there yet there is now room for a person to stand, to sit, to lie down, have friends with them AND a dog. Basically it's a party shed, hahaha. Before hand it was either myself or Andrew got to stand in the shed out of the rain whilst holding Maggie.

It's just too ingenious to even explain properly but basically:
1) there is a huge storage bin on wheels with most of our stuff in it (including the lawn mower),
2) it has a little shelf above it,
3) then there's a fab higher shelf which also magically slides out (what?!!) and

4) when the box is brought forward the top shelf sits on top and is exactly the same height as the lower shelf = day bed! AWESOME!

Naturally this is a project that will have a few blog post instalments but fear not I shall share the glory of it all with you!!!!

Love and hugs, oh and may your bulbs be poking through and bringing you joy and hope my friends xxxx

This is what it's all about

I have been tardy with my writing and I am sorry but I have been very unwell both physically (I still have the flu!) and mentally. In fact I have been so ill in my noggin that I was for giving up on life altogether and that my friends is a really frightening thing to hear yourself say, but I was serious about it.

I've got out of that particular downward spiral and now I feel I little stronger and able to fight. And I intend to win, in time :)

For now it is all about resting; just allowing myself some grace and cutting out the 'I have tos' and the 'I really ought tos'... Resting now will give me energy and strength and hopefully when I do recover the good times will last a while :) Wow, see how much more positive I am? - I never thought I would get here again.

You know one thing that has really helped? This....

Andrew told me they were coming out but I didn't believe him (I was in my dark place) until I went outside myself this afternoon. This is Ecotherapy it's purest form, a single bud resurrected from the depths of the cold earth simply to herald hope.

HOPE; it grows within me again.....

Namasté my friends xx

Post-holiday Blues

I was in beautiful, truly beautiful Amsterdam with my hubby for a few days there and it was, well beautiful :D We didn't indulge in any of the 'herb' chill out remedy let me put that out there right now! We love Pugs not Drugs (not my drawing; the genius is Gemma Correll). But the beer and wine is oh so fine!

 

There wasn't a single in bloom Tulip to be seen but it was enjoyable, cold, very damp but lovely. I even saw some (out of season, naturally, but rather tidy) allotments from the train just on the outskirts of the city - yay!!

But I had the flu the whole time and felt so ill - poor me. Today my temperature was all over the place and Andrew went to the Allotment without me! However he has done incredible things to our shed and tomorrow I am going, so yes I AM :D I have seen blurry phone photos of the amazing DIY construction he has achieved and you are going to be so impressed.

Yes, I wrote this short post just to tell you that.

Our shed is going to be the most a cosy hideaway ever (on an alloment).

Remember Book Tokens?

So sweet gardening pals, are you the same as me, is the weather killing your dreams and plans for the plot? I am seriously fed up with the dull and damp and dreary skies and sodden ground - really Mother Nature is not playing fair. So I offer you a more comfortable alternative in this post - gardening books.

Remember when you did well at school and you got a book token? Oh how I miss those days. We didn't get a single book on gardening from Santa this year. Not that we really need any as Andrew has this habit of visiting a glorious second hand book shop close to his work and bringing home fabulous finds, even some from the 50s, which I love because they have detailed drawings over the often style-over-substance photography books we get now.

So here I would love to share with you some of my favourite gardening books from the Gault library.

 

First I feel I ought to do a little review on an equally little gift book I was sent to look at from Summerdale. Dig for Victory (Gift) is a fun little book that would have been perfect as a stocking filler for anyone. It costs less than a fiver and is beautifully bound with a cool retro cover. Basically it's just sweet with little one sentence facts and tips about growing your own interspersed with encouraging quotes. For a novice the hints would prove very interesting and sometimes rather quirky so for all the price it is I would definitely give it a thumbs up. (They also do an adorable looking 'Make Do and Mend' partner book which I think I would like too).

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However, if it's the more involved book you are looking for with that War Era Ethos then you simply can't beat Digging for Victory: Wartime Gardening with Mr Middleton. I bought myself a copy of this about 2 years ago and think it's fabulous. It takes you by the hand (remember the original version was designed for home owners to grow their own in their own gardens out of necessity and Government decree) and guides you through the growing year with a charm that is so very BBC and 'proper'. I delight in it as an educational tool but also as simply an entertaining read to dip in and out off.

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For Veggie growing in particular I have a super duper soft spot for The Allotment Book by Andi Clevely, it's the first one we bought specifically for the plots :) For a novice it is a life saver but we have found it still is a go to book and that is us in our 5th year, so I think it's  must have. I especially love the sections at the start of each chapter which detail so simply what you could sow now, plant now and eat now even throwing in a few easy recipes - it really makes the whole thing such fun, which is exactly how it should be!

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Lastly for me the must have books are those written by the River Cottage people. They very cleverly mix knowledge with stylish photography, layout and gorgeous paper and covers like no other people I have seen yet. Yes I am one of those people to whom the texture and density of the paper is exciting. These could easily be coffee table books, so I like them okay!? First up for me is Veg Patch: River Cottage Handbook No.4 by Mark Diacono who is basically a genius. Who else can make soil types, pests and compost so interesting and bring out that inner geek in you? I love his personal twist on how we all have favourites and dream veggies to grow and he helps to calm you down and tell you what is best for where you are = I want him to live in my shed and just tell me stories whilst making me totally organic and knowledgeable; heaven.

This is one I shall be using this year a lot so you'll see loads of it - Preserves: River Cottage Handbook No.2 by Pam Corbin.... oh and this one  too- Hedgerow (River Cottage Handbook) by John Wright. I have my eyes set on making more of the food we grow and the berries etc that we see whilst out walking. 2013 is going to be a good one!!!
So I hope this inspires you to read up on new techniques, get cool recipes gathered together and prepare of an AWESOME new year. Here are some of the others that Andrew will be reading and I shall looking at the pictures in, lol. We sort of love books in this house :)

Love and Hugs x

Update
Andrew has asked that his favourite book be highlighted and naturally I have had to comply :) He loves Grow Your Own Vegetables by Joy Larkcom as shown here >

He feels it speaks to him and has the most comprehensive, practicable and simple information on individual vegetables. Ms Larkcom has travelled the world and gained much knowledge on the topic of growing your own which she shares here with obvious enthusiasm. It naturally covers the areas of soil type, pests and tools as well. It's main ethos though seems to be getting the most out of the space you have and who doesn't like the sound of that?!

It's basically just his cup of metaphorical tea :)

"comprehensive and covers everything" - Mr Andrew Gault